As a believer growing in faith, it’s easy to believe we can marry any believer, especially if it’s someone we like.

But overtime experiences and statistics have shown that not all believers are compatible.

Although the bible we believe is one, it has been misinterpreted over time by different people.

For someone like me who grew up in a Catholic home, attended a Baptist school but veered off into pentecostal years later, I know how hard it can be to unite people of different doctrines but with the same belief in one God who reveals his personality through the Trinity.

God the Father, God the Son and God the HolyGhost.

Now you may wonder, if we all believe in the same God, that should be strong enough to determine the direction of the relationship.

But that’s not true. And these are the following reasons

Same God, different doctrines

In the body of Christ we have diverse doctrines. There are people who don’t believe in eating meat while some observe lent religiously.

Some don’t believe in the audible voice of the HolySpirit speaking to his children while some emphasize the need to confess our sins to an earthly Priest.

And the list goes on.

I’m not here to judge any doctrine.

Personally, I believe God’s perfection in me through Jesus Christ is possible.

I believe that by obeying Jesus, I can become like Him. On Earth, and not until I get to heaven.

I believe I have a race to run and I must finish it before my dying day.

Not every Christian believes this, although it’s in the bible that we are to be perfect as our heavenly father is perfect.

This might be problematic for someone who believes ministry is their ultimate calling or goal in life.

It will definitely be difficult to live with someone who doesn’t believe pleasing God and loving him with my soul spirit and body is my sole existence for living.


Because when I’m trying to run my race, I’ll either be pleading with my spouse to run his race or lose focus and become lackadaisical about God’s will for me.

And the last thing I want my kids to feel is confusion in a home that should be impregnated with God’s peace, love and salvation.

Also, not many believers are clear on their purpose yet. It’s one thing if your future spouse is open to learning, and it’s another thing to resist it. This will definitely cause trouble in the long run and ultimately prevent God’s plan from being fulfilled in your life.

God’s leading is vital when choosing a spouse

God is so wise and intelligent he leads two compatible people together.

You don’t have to be perfect to be compatible with your spouse


The goal is to choose God’s will so as to end up in his destination.

I wrote a post about the benefits of accepting God’s choice in marriage here.

When God leads us, we will end up marrying according to the spirit, not flesh.

This is because we’re allowing God’s choice to translate into ours and His will is established on earth.

Spiritual growth

First of all, you need to understand that the most important thing to your Father God is your spiritual growth.

That is what motivates God to matchmake you with His child.

In fact God is so interested in your salvation process he is jealous about leading you and directing you to get it right.

This is because marriage can either make or marr you

But not every Christian is interested in spiritual growth.

Some children of God don’t know God’s will and not every believer understands their role in the kingdom.

Some are also not interested in going deeper into God while some use God to fuel their ambitions.

So the thought of marrying a spiritual illiterate should be far from our minds the way it is in the physical.

Only God knows those that are His

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.

Matthew 7:21

Not everyone that calls on God is really doing God’s will and I’m sure you wouldn’t want to end up with someone living in disobedience.

God who sees the heart of men knows those who love Him and those that don’t.

As an aspiring mother, I would want the best for my future children.

I believe God does the same for us when matchmaking his children.

As Christians interested in doing God’s will, God is so good he connects us with someone who will contribute to our growth, not the opposite.

But when we resist his will and take matters into our hands, we sabotage our growth in the process.

You can check out more about godly relationship posts below

Bloom with Love. Xx!